Colbert Reveals What Really Happened to Triumph the Insult Comic Dog and ‘Late Show’ Staffers at Capitol

He has to say something.

“Quick question, how was your weekend?” Stephen Colbert said at the beginning Late show monologue on Monday. “I definitely had an interesting one, because some of my employees had a memorable one.”

From there, Colbert went on to break down all the previously unknown details about the seven Late show staff have arrested on Capitol Hill last week while filming a comedy about the committee hearings on January 6.

“This is what happened,” he explained. “Last week, I heard from my former colleague Triumph the Insult Comic Dog. Triumph suggested going to DC and interviewing several people in Congress to highlight the January 6 hearings. I said, ‘Sure, if you can agree to talk to you, because – and please don’t take this as an insult – you are a puppet.’ “

Colbert confirmed that both Democrats and Republicans of Congress have agreed to speak with Triumph, The humorous creation of writer Robert Smigel—And he and Late show The crew spent two days filming the scene in offices across from the Capitol building. “They passed security,” he said, and filmed all Wednesday and all Thursday, being invited into the offices of the people they were interviewing.

It was towards the end of their second day on Thursday when “Triumph and my men were approached and detained by the Capitol Police,” he continued. “Actually, that’s not surprising. Capitol police are much more cautious than they were 18 months ago, and for a very good reason. If you don’t know what that reason is, I know what news network you watch.”

According to the presenter, people were just “doing their job”, they were “very professional” and “very calm”. The Late show crew was “detained, processed, and released—a very frustrating experience for my staff, a lot of ink for the Capitol Police, but a very simple story.”

“It wasn’t until the next night, when a few people on television started claiming that the puppet team had ‘committed to insurrection’ at the building of the United States,” he said, referring to absurd remarks by Tucker Carlson and others.

“First of all, what?” Colbert said. “Second, huh? Third, they’re not in the Capitol building. Fourth, and I am shocked to have to explain the difference, but an uprising that involves circumventing the lawful actions of Congress and howling the blood of elected leaders, all are intended to prevent a peaceful transfer of power. This is the first level puppetry. These are hijinks with scam intent. Appropriating old things Conan little.”

Colbert said it was “predictable” that people like Carlson would make such outrageous claims. “They wanted to talk about something other than the January 6 hearing on the real uprising of seductions that resulted in the deaths and injuries of more than 140 police officers, ” he said. “But drawing any parallels between the rioters who stormed into our Capitol to stop the counting of ballots and a toy dog ​​sucking on a cigar is a shameful and disgusting insult. disgusting to the memory of all who have died, and it obscenely trivializes the service and bravery of the Capitol Police displayed on that terrible day. ”

“But who knows, there might be a big plot to overthrow the US government with a rubber Rottweiler,” he joked. “We all know the long history of puppet power. The Great Muppet Caper, the Fraggle riots of the 1980s.”

“In this case, our puppet is just a puppet doing puppet shows,” he reassured viewers. “And sadly to say, so much has changed in Washington that the Capitol Police were on high alert because of the attack on January 6. And as the hearings become clearer every day, all responsibility for that actual uprising rests with Putin’s puppet.”

There is still no word on when the work that Triumph and the crew were filming last week will air on TV. Late eveningBut when it happens, it’s definitely one for the ages.

For more, listen to Robert Smigel on The Last Laugh Podcast.

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